How to heal from pain...

Jesus said, “If you’re going to fulfil your destiny, you need to get good at letting things go.”

Offences will come. He didn’t say they might come only if you're a bad person or that, if you’re kind, no one will ever hurt you. He said disappointments, betrayals, and unfair situations will come. How you handle the pain—how you deal with offences—will determine whether you move forward into the new things God has in store, or whether you stay stuck, bitter over what didn’t work out.

There’s a saying: “If you don’t heal from emotional wounds, you’ll bleed on people who didn’t cut you.” So many people are still wounded—over how they were raised, a friend who walked away, or a business partner who betrayed them. Instead of releasing it, they replay the hurt over and over in their minds. And they wonder why their relationships are struggling—it's because they haven't healed yet. If you don’t let it go, that wound will follow you wherever you go.

If you're still carrying the pain from a job you lost, you might walk into your new workplace defensive, guarded, and unfriendly—treating people based on what you've been through, even though they had nothing to do with it.

There is so much freedom in learning to let things go. Yes, what happened may not have been fair. But that’s okay—God is your vindicator. He will take care of those who wronged you. It’s not your job to pay people back. They hurt you once—don’t let them keep hurting you by holding on to it.

If you’ve lost a loved one, I know that pain can be overwhelming. It’s okay to mourn, but you cannot live in mourning forever. Holding on to that pain will keep you from the new doors God wants to open in your life. You must be healed in order to see new relationships and opportunities. In scripture, Peter once asked Jesus, “How many times should I forgive someone who wrongs me?” Peter, who himself was known to be hot-tempered—he even cut off a soldier’s ear when Jesus was arrested—suggested seven times. He was actually doubling the traditional Jewish law of forgiving three times. But Jesus replied, “I tell you, not seven times, but seventy times seven.”

Jesus wasn’t just giving a number—He was teaching a principle: live in a continual process of forgiveness. Not something you do occasionally, but something you practice every single day. He was setting up a system to help us release offenses, hurts, and bitterness—because He knew we’d face them regularly. And the quicker we let them go, the easier it becomes.

In the Lord’s Prayer, Jesus taught us to pray, “Give us this day our daily bread, and forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive those who trespass against us.” 

That means forgiveness should be a daily habit.

It doesn’t have to be a big thing—even the guy who cuts you off in traffic—let it go. Don’t let something small ruin your whole day. Your time and peace are too valuable. That rude person at the grocery store? Smile and move on.

I’ve learned: life is full of wounded people. Many haven’t healed from their past, and they’ll sometimes act out of their pain—being rude or disrespectful. You can’t stop the offenses from coming, but you can stop them from getting inside you.

So ask yourself: how much time are you spending offended or bitter, carrying around emotional baggage? How much more could you accomplish if you would just let it go? How much better could your relationships be if you got emotionally healthy?

Let it go. Forgive the people who hurt you. Quit reliving the pain.